In the recent past, I have had three interactions with people that have made comments that bring thought to something that is interesting and sad. I would like to say that at least two of the contacts spoke from a place of love but the other...from true hurt and deep wounds.
In August of last year, someone that I should be close to said that she never felt like she could be close to me because she was afraid she wouldn't live up to my standards. She went on to say that I couldn't accept her for who she is. She has deep wounds in her hurt from her childhood that put up walls, keeping us from bonding.
Another instance, I had a phone conversation with a friend that said that she thought I had it all together and never messed up. This was after I gave testimony of mess ups in my life. She continued with saying that I always seemed so perfect. She thanked me for sharing and it really was a beautiful conversation. We had really only know each other from a distance so I praise God for the bonding experience.
Recently, I received a text that pointed out a list of things that, in her mind, I had done and followed with me being on a pedestal. She continued with tearing me done in a very obvious attempt to cover her own wounds and hurt. She made it so real, the pain she is living with, but has walls up that will be so hard to penetrate. God may use me there one day but I can only pray for her for now.
Why is it that people PUT you on a pedestal and then tear you down for being on said pedestal? I have never thought of myself as worthy of a pedestal but quite the opposite. But somehow these three people, with probably others, have made me into this perfection that is so far from being reality. It makes me feel like I might have put up walls and guarded myself from these ladies. Well--I have. I have past hurts that have caused me to hide behind the hurt and pain. That's what we do.
We are none perfect or worthy of pedestals but, sometimes get put up there by people that don't know the real person we are. Only one of these three ladies has really tried to get to know me. The others have kept themselves at a distance. When we try to hide behind hurt and pain, it's difficult to desire a relationship with people who, in our own minds, are on these nonexistent pedestals.
Throughout my life I have tried to be easy to get along with and tried to love everyone, even the really difficult to love. The Bible says, "Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves." Philippians 2:3 NLT. I have tried to live by this but somehow get stereotyped, as a Christian, into being self-righteous.
Because people have put me on some kind of pedestal, when I do stumble, it appears to be that I was living a lie. Are Christians, followers of Christ, immune from sin for some reason that I haven't found? The answer would be no. However, we should live a life that is an example of Christ. When we stumble we should easily recognize it and have a repentant heart.
Having Christ in us doesn't make us perfect and free from sin. It makes us conscious of it and repentant of it. We will not be perfect while living on this earth. We can grow in Christ by studying His Word and having an intimate relationship with God. Jesus died on the cross because He knew we weren't going to be perfect. Praise God!
As others put us on these make believe pedestals, we have to remember that it is because they are comparing themselves to us. They are seeking something that they like in us but are afraid to ask where we got it. They are valuing themselves as a lesser when they really don't have to. I would love nothing more than to share Christ and His love with these ladies or anyone else that is grasping.
God says we are none better than each other. We are, also, none good in comparison to God. I want to urge each person that reads this to try and get to know the people that you have contact with. Don't judge a book by its cover. Don't judge at all. My cover may appear put together and righteous but if you ask...I will explain how God is working in my life. I will tell you about pain and shame that God has taken into His loving hands, making Him the only One that belongs on a pedestal.
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